Cursed: Wickedly Fun Stories

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Learn how to enable JavaScript on your browser. NOOK Book. Dark, sexual, scatological, violent, and mordantly funny, these fractured fables span city and country, animal and human, myth and politics. His characters and insights are at once hauntingly familiar, peculiar, and twisted. He has published several novels, including Beauty Is a Wound and Man Tiger , as well as many short stories.

Customer Reviews Average Review. See All Customer Reviews. Shop Books. Add to Wishlist. USD Buy Online, Pick up in Store is currently unavailable, but this item may be available for in-store purchase. Sign in to Purchase Instantly. Product Details About the Author. Average Review. Joshua was born in the land of Egypt during the ages of great upheaval in the heavens. While the age of myth was falling apart, the age of man was rising to power.

Great wars scattered across a landscape bathed in the blood of legends, both mortal and immortal. The family of Joshua weren't famous warriors or commanders, just land owners who managed the farms for the household of the local governor. The governor, Potiphar the twelfth, was a good man and cared for this family.

So close was the governor to the family that when their son was born he let young Joshua sit under the scholars that taught his own children. Joshua learned foreign tongues, history, and poetry. Potiphar had a daughter that was near Joshua's age. When the time came, Joshua petitioned her father for her hand in marriage. This would bring great wealth and power into his family.

But, he didn't care, Joshua only cared about the immeasurable love he had for Ahmose. Before Potiphar could agree to the request Ahmose suddenly proclaimed she had accepted the proposal of another young man of Egypt. A warrior of noble stature and many victories.

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Joshua was crushed. He wasn't a strong man, only the son of a farmer. His only fighting was against the animals that threatened their livestock. He was no match for this virile soldier of the Pharaohs armies.

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Distraught he left his home and wandered into the desert in hopes of perishing under the sun. He couldn't imagine life lived in such disgrace. Soon he came upon a natural cistern in the lands of the Ishmaelites. The water was very low for it was early in the dry season. But, he was thirsty so he climbed in and fell into the water at the bottom. Once he had drunk the stale, dusty water, he saw something odd glistening in the moonlight. A small oil lamp made of bronze and carved with intricate design.

Picking up the lamp he felt that it was warm, even after sitting in the cold water all this time. Looking deep into the etchings he saw words in a language that was not common to his people. But, he had studied under Potiphars scholars and knew enough to read a little of the text. The recent wars against the god like beings have left many strange and powerful items laying around, items that should be avoided unless you know how to deal with them. Then a devilishly clever idea crept into his mind.

If he brought this item to the lord of Egypt and presented it for destruction, then Joshua would be rewarded handsomely by the Pharaoh. This would certainly draw the attention back from the beautiful Ahmose. Grabbing up the lamp he climbed out of the cistern, soaked up to his waist in dirty water but still with a good smile on his lips.

Joshua journeyed for a full day back toward his homelands. It was a long walk, but he was certain of his victory. The evening of the first leg of his journey he rested by the road and looked at the lamp again. Something about this item fascinated him, he wanted to know what was inside. But, he couldn't bring himself to look out of fear for his life.

He examined the writing closer and pondered how he would approach the Pharaoh. It would look better if he could explain more than the mismatched words he already read. But, this stupid thing was so dirty no one could read it. Using his sleeve he rubbed the surface of the bronze lamp to clean it off. It rattled in his hands and he nearly dropped it. Misfortune is all he will give, lock him inside if you wish to live.

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The cloud transformed into half a large man that floated above the wispy smog beneath him. It was an enormous blue skinned person that appeared as a very strong man, at least from the waist up.

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He floated aloft with only smoke as his legs and a wicked sneer spread across his face. Such a pitiful mortal cowering in fear!

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Stand up, shout for joy, you have gained much this day, little one! Joshua was not certain what to make of all of this. This thing was happy, joyous in fact, and speaking very amicably. So, with a lot of shaking, he lowered his arm and got to his feet. A great and powerful lord of magic. Tell me, what is the age? How Long have I been imprisoned in that lamp? He has betrayed us. We Egyptians worship no one, sir. If you think you have ordered but aren't sure, feel free to email us and we will check for you.

Refunds will NOT be issued if you notice after the refund deadline has passed. This is a fluid process that will vary from signing to signing. I am so glad that this book happened to find its way into my review pile! Lately, I have been so drawn to short stories - I love how they get right into the heart of a story, allow your imagination to run wild, and are ironically page-turning.

Well, not only does Susan Abel Sullivan give me all that I love about short stories in this compilation, but she also delivers a sense of humor, wit and playfulness that cannot be beat.

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This book will literally having you laughing out loud and, in my opinion, wanting more at the end of each chapter. Here's a run-down of each story:. This was definitely my favorite of the five. You can read into it in so many ways, and I loved how it didn't play into any of your normal stereotypes. Amazing :. A hilarious story about a boy who realizes that he can control the future with his poetry. What does a teenage boy do with all that power?

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In a nutshell: it's about a killer vine that threatens to take over all of the southern United States. I mean I would say, "you can't make this stuff up", but apparently, Susan Sullivan can!

A Regular Gem of a Hoax

Kind of similar to The Accidental Poet - it's about a man who realizes that what he writes in a story will end up happening in real life. Loved it!